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My life at Winestead Hall

by Sylvia Dawson

It all started when i was 12 yrs old. I used to live in a children's home in London. I had been there about 11 months when my Social Worker told me that they had found a new placement for me, with schooling on site.

Now, i hated school so i didnt want to go, but i gave in to a visit.

Well, when i arrived at the school, i liked it immediatly. I met Jochen and Steen and they talked me through the "Program". One thing they made sure i knew for certain, was that i could NOT be expelled for any reason. I found this odd, but it slipped my mind.

They talked with my Social worker and we left. I few days later i got a call saying that a date had been set up for me to move in. September 1993.

Well, the move was uneventfull. Every one seemed nice, and they all tried to make me feel at home.

The problems began about a month later when I was due to go on Home leave. Jochen said i must stay onsite for 3 Months before i could see my family. Well, naturally i flipped out at this.

I was restrained and given kitchen duties for a week. Now to some people this might not seem to bad, but you have to understand that there were maybe 40 students, 10 members of staff and a huge kitchen. I had to clean the hall, wash the dishes after every meal, take the food to the hall, and clean the kitchen after the cook had finished. I never got any school work done that week.

After that "Minor" incident, we had a building weekend. We had to paint, build, plaster, rewire, basically what you paid a handyman to do. I thought this was totally out of order, as social services were paying for this to be done by them, not us. I told my social worker and he called Steen. As far as i know, he was told that the Students had Not been following the program and this was their punishment. Again i flipped.

But this time i did not get restrained as usual, this time Jochen out right assaulted me. I have the scars to remind me. It involved pulling my hair, kicking and a couple of slaps.

Things went down hill from there. I had been there about 3 Months when a bunch of us decided to run away. We set off about 9:30 pm. We traveled across the fields of neighbouring farms.

It was about 9:00am when i got caught. Steen picked me up in the Jeep and took me straight back to the school. I was so scared . But nothing happened. 2 weeks later Home leave was up. I couldnt go.

I didnt do anything. I was too scared. It was like Military school. You go AWOL and you really paid for it.

They didnt stop my home leave for Christmas though. I didnt think they had enough gut's to do that.

Well, i got home and told my family what happened. What i didnt know was that someone had called and said i was telling lies to the police! I hadnt even seen any police since i had been there. My family didnt believe a word from my lip's.

Boxing day came, and i was taken to Newcastle train station, for my trip to Norway. Jochen was there to pick me up. I didnt want to go but i had to. It was part of the "Program". We got to the docks,and boarded the ferry. The trip was pretty smooth all the way to Norway.

Norway was beautifull. But one problem. The Jeep couldnt take going up the mountain to the Hotel. We broke down, and Jochen told us to start walking up the Mountain. It was freezing outside and we were told to walk!!?? None of us argued. We started walking. I think we had been going for about 3 hours when they brought the Mini van down to see what happened. We were taken to the Hotel. We had a nice meal, and then to bed.

The next day we were woken at about 7:00 am to get ready to Ski. We got to the slopes (Lillehammer)

and we were fitted with ski's. I had no idea what i was doing, so i went to the Baby slope. I went down a few times quiet well. After a few up's and down's, i decided i wanted to try the little jumps. I went back up to the top, and started down. Then all i remember was opening my eyes to see 5 or 6 people around me. I had a nasty fall oneof them said. Jochen turned up and started cursing in German. He took me back to the Hotel, and told me to go lie down. I ended up in bed for about 4 days. Due to not having warm enough clothes, i had pnuemonia. Jochen said i was faking it and wouldnt do a thing. It wasnt untill the 5th day when i made a desk clerk call the hospital. I was taken and they gave me some pills and sent me back.

When we got back to England, i was told if i said anything about it i would be punished like i had never known before. I nearly hit him. But i didnt say anything.

Over the next few months in 1994 i was beaten, racialy attacked and sexually abused, by the students and teacher's. Now i would love to be able to tell you what happened, but i honestly cant remember much about it.

I had tried to run away a few times, but no luck at all. I was allways caught.

Well, in March 1995 i was expelled. Now how that happened, is a funny thing.

Around the begining of Febuary, I showed Jochen what i had kept. I had recordings of things he said to me, photos of him hitting the kid's. And plenty of In House memos. I had been sneaking around for about 6 months collecting all i could to get myself out of there. He told me to find a place to go and he would expell me. I called my Mother and she agreed that i could go home. He told me that i had to give him all the things i had. Stupid me i did. Well i got out. After 18 months of hell, i got away.

It has taken me nearly 6 years to come to terms with what happened, But i did. I have gone through so much, but i have learned a great deal.

I am sure one day it will all come out in the open, and all those people will be stoped. But untill that day comes i can say this, All those children i lived with will comeout one day. Some one will pay for what they have done, and i hope and pray that it will come soon, so no one else has to be hurt.

Sylvia Dawson  <baby_98_98@hotmail.com>